Vermiana (Part III of the Io Jaxx trilogy)
There is no question that this tale of sexual predation is the edgiest screenplay I've ever written (probably the edgiest I ever will write). Screenwriting gurus often talk of tapping primal emotions. Is there anything more primal than an absolutely uninhibited sex drive? And then the fact that it's a woman manifesting that trait and that she is the helpless victim of a man-made bio-weapon just twists things a little further. It's fun but it's definitely not for the faint of heart. The lyrics are typed out just below the audio player.
You touch Vermiana, you get portulaxis
Your lovin’ banana, it never relaxes,
[CLEAN VERSION – “Cast your eyes upon her, your will power relaxes”]
But touch Vermiana, and get portulaxis.
You get portulaxis, and soon you’ll die.
A man who tastes of her charms, he will live no more
For Vermiana, she carries the deadly spore
Of portulaxis, the sickness that all despise,
He will be startin’ to swell right before your eyes,
But there is one in a million who will not burst
He is an unlucky man for his fate is worse,
He loses all of his will, he cannot refuse her desire.
He lives to obey her. He cannot betray her.
Amuse her and tease her, he’ll service and please her
He must “step & fetch it,” his life it is wretched.
A brief time of slavery, and then he’ll die.
The time is passin’ and most of her slaves have died,
So Vermiana prepares for her deadly ride.
She exercises the strength of her evil eye,
She will be usin’ it soon and she must rely
On hypnotizin’ a man who is free to choose,
The only hope for the planet is he refuse her.
Never once has she failed for a man like that’s mighty rare.
This job calls for Io. He’ll get help from Dexter.
The will to deny her, the skill to perplex her.
They find out the planet on which she has landed.
They make plans to meet there, and off they fly.
When Io lands on the planet, he lifts the door,
He does not know that the air it is filled with spore.
He takes a breath, the disease takes its deadly hold,
Io Jaxx starts to swell, so the story’s told.
And in a moment our hero will live or die,
Dexter’s ship starts to land, there’s a friend nearby
He was slightly detained making up the suit that he wears.
The fabric is coslon. Got rivets of flextron.
It’s sealed to protect him, no spores will infect him
He starts out his testing, the time it is racing.
He must make the vaccine for Io Jaxx
The hypodermic he fills with his new vaccine,
He counteracted the spores with bizantrazene.
No time to test it, he gives it to Io Jaxx,
And in a moment he’ll know how the spore reacts.
Now Io’s head starts to clear and the swelling dies,
Determination is flashing within his eyes
Vermiana is in for a great surprise, she’ll be cured.
They’ll be neutralizin’, the spores and the poison.
She’ll get an injection to cure her infection.
Io plans to meet her, so he can defeat her.
He gives her a challenge she can’t refuse.
The competition would be, could she hypnotize him?
If she could Io Jaxx would become the prize
He would remain on her planet, accept his fate,
He’d face her time and again, she would dominate.
With her insatiable lust she cannot deny
The thrill of owning a man who just might defy
Her, she accepts Io’s challenge to meet our hero alone.
Io wears the lenses that Dexter created.
Augments his defenses, her strength is abated.
Though his will is tested, he cannot be bested.
Her efforts are wasted on Io Jaxx.
IO JAXX HAS CURED THE QUEEN. DEXTER USED BIZANTRAZENE
PORTULAXIS, IT HAS SEEN ITS LAST VICTIM.
COULD IT BE HERE’S IO JAXX? TRUSTY SWORD AND FEARSOME AXE?
FIGHTS FOR GOOD, DRIVES EVIL BACK, HE’S OUR HERO
COULD IT BE HERE’S DEXTER EUL? WHIZ WITH GIZMOS, MASTER OF TOOLS
BUILDS THE MEANS TO FINISH THE CRUEL KNIGHTS OF DARKNESS
Multiple repeats of above refrain pair – fade out.